To the Window
To the Wal(mart)
June 2013
hi, table for two?
alright sir if you and your laptop want to follow me
so i went to put on my deodorant when i noticed something on the back. the word “ATOMIC” caught my eye so i was like hold up what am i rubbing on my pits
awesome
You’re holding the secret weapon to win this war young man
im gonna be 60 years old one day and i will probably still wake up in the middle of the night sometimes in a cold sweat, wondering if i finished my homework.
don’t be friends with seniors because they will graduate and leave you and it’ll suck
DON’T BE FRIENDS WITH UNDERCLASSMEN BECAUSE YOU WILL HAVE TO LEAVE THEM AND IT WILL SUCK
don’t be friends with seniors if you’re a senior because they’ll go to a different college than you and it will suck.
Don’t be friends on Tumblr because they will live far away and it will suck.
remember back in like 5th grade when everyone vowed they would never do drugs
i’ll never delete my tumblr so when my kids are like “ugh MOM u don’t understand”, i’ll show them my tumblr so they can realize i was once young & laughed at dick jokes
how to tell if something is nsfw
would you show it to a nice old lady with 2 cats who takes knitting as a hobby
idk whats she into
how dare you not notice me while i ignore you
my wedding cake is going to be a pizza
If only I could generate a decent income out of laying in bed

